The Metz Family is now 4!

So, yes, it's true, we are now a family of 4. This all happened a little faster than we anticipated, but nonetheless, here we are! Ryan was, of course, a little more shocked than I am, and I think we both have our days were we ride a roller coaster of emotions, but ready or not, here she (or he) comes! Are we a little crazy? Probably. Will we be by the time this is all said and done? Definitely!
This pregnancy so far has been completely different! I have been sooo nauseous. Thank goodness for the modern invention of anti-nausea medicine. Can't wait to fill that presciption. There hasn't been a day that has gone by that I don't feel green or throw up. Too much info? Well, imagine how I feel LOL. We had our first ultrasound yesterday, and we have quickly dubbed this baby our "little jellybean" because that it was what she looks like. So far, everything is right on track. They confirmed my due date of 5/25/2009. I had no doubt of when it was though. The perk of working in Labor and Delivery and having more intricate knowledge of this process.
This past week was my first week on my own at work. Now I can say without jinxing myself that it went really well. No major problems with my patients, and I handled the workload with more ease that I was anticipating. I think I have more confidence now, and I am little more organized now that I don't have to be aware of how my preceptor works. I can develop more of my own routine which I think helps me tremendously. I don't know why, but it seems like I think a little more clearly when I have my own set up. It was the same way when I was at St. Mary's. It is still nice to be able to rely on my coworkers when I do have questions. In a lot of ways, it doesn't feel like I am out of orientation because there is so much help. However, I am so ready for these 8 days off!
My best bud, Rachel, is on her 3rd weekend in Ohio. I am so proud of her! She is taking being on her own head on, and is doing so great! I am so happy that she can fill her weekends with seeing family, I know that probably helps a ton! Now, if we can only deal with those pesky neighbors...
Mr. Daniel is doing so well! In the past 2 weeks has matered crawling and pulling himself up to a standing postion. It's only a matter of time before this kiddo is really on the go (and my house will be in complete shambles!) Daily I thank God for blessing Ryan and myself with this child. I know I have said it before, but I have learned so much about myself just by parenting him. God had a plan we he placed this baby in our lives, and now we have another to share in our lives. Wether not it's a girl or boy makes no difference as long as this child is healthy. It's going to be an interesting 7 more months!

Time for an update

The times are flying here in the Metz household! Daniel is 9 months now, and there is no stopping him! This boy will scoot, flip, and "caterpillar" his way around the entire house. There is no toy (or Momma's decorations) that is safe from his grip. Daniel is talking up a storm, on his way to having 6! teeth, and has grown so much out of his car seat that we have no choice but to buy the forward facing one. He is so much fun and has so much personality! I have a feeling he is going to be quite the handful once he is completely mobile!

Rach and I tried a new church this past Sunday. Destiny church is at Manchester and 270. I have to say that I was completely impressed. There are a few different pastors and I had the pleasure of hearing the sermon of Jim Stern. Never have I heard such a meaningful and devoted word of God made in such a way that was completely understandable and soo entertaining! I'm excited to go back :)

I'm nearing the end of my Fellowship and orientation in Labor and Delivery. I'm super nervous and excited to be out on my own. I pray and hope that these last few shifts will be so that I get more pushing experience with moms, and give me more comfort in my skills. I will start to work straight nights next week. It will be a transition, but I think for the better.

Not many of you know, but my grandma and grandpa have been having some troubles with their marriage. I'm not a fan of divorce, but I understand their reasons. I do worry about my grandma though. I worry for her fast life-altering decisions, and I worry that once she moves to Florida, I may never see/hear from her again. It almost feels as if she is replacing one family with another. I know that it's been hard to travel even the 2 hours to see her now, but I can't even imagine what it is going to be like to travel 16 hours. I pray that she ultimately makes the right decision for her, and sees everything for what it truly is.

Ryan and I are working hard to try and establish a budget that will allow us to become mostly debt free next year. It is our goal to have me become part time by next summer. It's nice to both share a common goal with each other-even if it is super hard!

I will walk among you; I will be your God, and you will be my people.

Leviticus 26:12

What deep waters of tragedy and sorrow do you face? You are not alone--God is with you, and he will not let you go under. What fire licks at your heels? Keep walking--God will shield you from the flames.

I needed that :)

Mommy's intuition

Oh, what a night! I got home from work yesterday and found Daniel and Ryan sleeping together on our bed-so cute. Ever ready for the photo op, I attempted to get a picture, but I think Ryan is just too sensitive to my camera and he noticed and mission: failed :( As they were both getting up, Ryan and I noticed Daniel was BEET RED and he was shivering. I got him into better light and was not at all comfortable with what I saw. I got his temp-normal-but he was still red and shivering. Ryan mentioned he had been fine all day except for one monster spit up. I got Danman's Ped on the phone, explained Daniel and the fact he 'just didn't look right' and we took him to the office. Dr. Mayer checked him and was so concerned we went to the ER-at St. Luke's. I already don't have the best opinion of St. Luke's and it was further irritated throughout the night, but more on that later. Anyway, not knowing what exactly was wrong, we consented to going there instead of SJMMC, and Daniel was admitted.

2 needle sticks later, we had blood drawn, blood cultures sent and IVF infusing. It turns out, his white count was high (the infection cells) and platlets were as well. Ah, a ticket to admission. We spent the night on their Peds floor and it was mostly uneventful, but Ryan and I were not impressed. Praise God that Daniel wasn't acting sickly or I don't know what I would have done. The nurses were nice, but ill informed of equipment and didn't seem to know quite how to handle a tired 8 month old.

It is still a mystery as to why his counts were high, but fluid and IV antibiotics helped being them down so we were able to be discharged. They think possibly the very beginnings of a type of Staph infection that causes "scalding" of the skin, but as of now, the blood culture wasn't growing anything. Daniel is a little susceptible to infection because of his eczema, so I am going to be even more diligent about keeping it soft. I am still so thankful that I called the Ped and got him in. He is of even better spirits today, and still trying to get the forward motion to crawl :) I have no doubt,especially with some of the nursing care that we got, the God healed our boy, and quite possibly stopped an even more serious infection. Thank you Lord!!

Issues

Sometimes I feel like the most rotten person alive. I think I have so much of a vivid imagination that it effects the people around me. I am unjustly unfair to one person in particular, but no amount of praying or self searching can rectify my unwillingness to share in my happiness. I hold back for fear that this particular person will invade my life. Sadly, I cannot even mention it because I don't even know how. Sadly, I am probably overreacting, but this is a justifiable emotion I carry. Sadly, I cannot even be completely honest in this blog for fear that another would speak before I could. I try, try so hard to be fair, but in the end, I walk away feeling the same. Why can't I overcome this?

I feel the need to blog

Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:1-5

My fingers are just itching to type away at the keyboard! Even more than that, I am feeling the need to shout God's praises as I sit here typing. I am filled with so much love and awe for Him at this very moment that I have to share.

This may sound silly, but I have been reading The Bible for Dummies because I want to know about the history of the stories. Occasionally, ok, more than that, I am confused about the Old Testament, but to see the story unfold and to really focus on this history, is beyond words. The Bible, this GLORIOUS book, speaks to me so much. Every day that I sit down for reflection, no matter the page I turn to, His word relates to my needs and feelings at the time. Everyday I am humbled to know He knows me-so much more than I know myself. He reaches out to me even when I am not so sure myself. He is so deserving!

I thank Him daily for my family, my circumstances (for better and for worse because I know He has a plan for me, a plan that helps me become a better me), my job and my faith. I fall short every day, but He guides me back.

* * * *

Daniel is 8 months tomorrow, and I just can't believe it! He has recently learned to clap his hands (although sometimes it's with only one hand) and to play "peek-a-boo". He sits like a champ and loves to tear apart things, and can scoot like there's no tomorrow! He loves his loin and monkey and growls so fiercely at them! I see so much of Ryan in his temperment and anxiously await to see the little person he is so fastly becoming.

The Big 23

Yes, another year older-and quite a year too! I had a very nice birthday (aside from yardwork LOL) and got many birthday wishes. Thanks so much! I look forward to seeing how 23 is going to feel!