What a week..and it's just Thursday

Whew! I am tired just thinking of everything that has happened this week! For starters, this past Sunday I committed myself to the church that I have been going to. I took that BIG first step and I am so happy that I did. I feel so complete now. And if committing myself to the Lord and feeling an immense calm over me wasn't proof that this decision was quite possibly the best I have made for myself, then the incident this past Monday proves that God is great and watches over my family. Ryan placed Daniel on his boppy on the couch and ran downstairs. I was unaware that this was happening. As I am cleaning up the kitchen I hear a bump and then a wail. My heart leaped out of my chest and I swear I stopped breathing. I raced over to the living room and there was my poor baby sitting on the floor next to his boppy. He slid of the couch, but only by the strong hands of God did he land on his boppy and bottom and not his head. Aside from some big tears, my baby was OK.
Then Tuesday night I had to deal with a notoriously verbally and physically abusive patient. That previous night he was fine, then no sooner do I go into his room Tuesday that he becomes his charming self. First agreeing to be turned, my CP and I begin and in the process he decides he doesn't want to be turned and starts cursing and swinging at my CP and before I have a chance to back away, he grabbed my arm and starts squeezing and scratching. I had on an isolation gown because this guy has some "super bugs", but that still didn't prevent my arm from becoming red. Oh, how angry was I! I filed and incident report (and not the first filed on him since he's been on my floor) and while talking to security I wonder how a hospital can keep admitting a patient with a long known history of being like this. Makes me wonder how much admin care about their employees...I truly did try to empathize with his situation, but I really could only go so far-especially after my night with him Tuesday. Fingers crossed that he was discharged.
On a lighter note, the weather is changing and the trees have leaves and I am so thankful we have signs of spring! I just feel better when the weather is like this. Although I could do without the birds chirping at 5 in the morning ;)

Oh the happenings in my life

This past Saturday I FINALLY ventured out sans Daniel and the hubby and spent some good ol' quality time with friends. The end result, lots of laughs, driving, alien secretions and a big pink tie. Good times.

This past Friday a beautiful baby girl entered the world. My best friend's sister was blessed with another child-one that is even more of a miracle than you'll ever know. Went to see her before she delivered at St. John's. It was awesome to be there and even more awesome to know that in a few short months I am there as a nurse! And in the nick of time because St. Mary's is poop.

Daniel is doing wonderfully. Everyday I am blessed to be able to watch him grow and interact with him and Ryan. He's a little chunky monkey! I weighed him on our home scale the other day-13.8 lbs! We go at the end of this month for his 4 month check up. We start talking solid food then!!!

I went to church again this past Sunday. Always a wonderful time. Each Sunday I get a little closer to going up to the stage and presenting myself as wanting to be a part of the congregation, but I still get nervous. I wish Ryan were a little more interested, but I guess that will come in time with some more praying and persuasion. I still have lots and lots and lots to learn, but I feel myself beginning to have a better relationship with Him. And that is good :)

Just believe

Great news-I got the Labor and Delivery RN position at St. John's. It could not have come at a better time. I was seriously starting to doubt that I would ever be happy at my profession, and overall I was getting a little depressed. But, my prayers were answered and my patience rewarded, and I start June 2! How lucky am I that I get to witness miracles every time I work?
My life is full of happiness and more meaning every day. I have so many things to be thankful for. My brother is home and safe and able to finally begin a relationship with his daughter, my parents and I are closer than ever, my husband and I are closer than ever, I have beautiful friends and my son is happy and healthy. I am so blessed. But most importantly, I am steadily learning more about my personal and spiritual journey. I am so grateful to have found a church were I am comfortable and can learn about God and his purpose for me in an inviting atmosphere. Easter means so much more to me this year. When you really stop and think about all that we have, it all comes down to Jesus dying on the cross for us; He sacrificed so that we could live and speak His word. It makes me so sad and so joyful at the same time. I look forward to growing as a Christian and becoming more comfortable speaking about it.

Frustration

I've realized today that I have serious problem forgiving and forgetting. The more I read and reflect on how God wants us to live our lives and become characteristically better, the more I see how I need to fine tune my life. The problem is, is it so hard for me to forgive and forget-and sometimes I'm not sure if I even want to. When the people you love have been wronged and walked on so many times, it really makes me rethink how much I want those particular people in Daniel's life. They are not characteristically the types of people I want Daniel to associate with. Some have tried to reach out and make contact, but I balk at the chance for them so see Daniel. Am I being too stubborn or do I legitimately have good reason? I have wrestled with this issue since the day he was born, and I want to do that best thing and the Christian thing, but I don't want to put my baby in a place where I'm not even comfortable being.
On a side note, Daniel has been so so fussy today and doesn't want to sleep and I am so worn out! I wish I knew how to make him more comfortable-other than toting him around for the rest of the night. It's all I can do to get a little comfort and quiet out of him.

Proud Mommy Moments

We went for Daniel's 2 month check-up today. He is 11 lbs. 15oz. and 24 in. long-so long!! He is hitting his milestones like a champ; I love watching him grow. Right now he is learning how his body moves and we can put him in his crib at one side and by the time he wakes up to eat, his arm and head are up against the other side of the crib! At one point he had managed to turn his body 90 degrees from where I had laid him.
Pretty soon Rob will be back from the UAE-yea! We won't get to see him till the end of March but atleast he'll finally get to see his new baby girl. I know Charity is really excited to have him back. It is still so weird to think that my brother is a daddy.
Tomorrow is my interview with DePaul-fingers crossed that is will go well! I really miss women's services and it would be wonderful to be 5 minutes from home!!
Sunday I will FINALLY be able to try out the new church I've been wanting to go to. I've really felt like there has been a missing peice in my life.
The other day I was driving to work and I realized something. People like to talk about themselves. And they like to read about other people. This is why Myspace and blogs are such a big hit-and People magazine. I love People magazine LOL. So, with that said, enjoy my post!

I've come to enjoy blogging

More pictures on Myspace! It's amazing that I get anything done on my days off :) We were supossed to go the the DR today, but the weather was gross so I cancelled and rescheduled. I'm excited to see how much more he has grown! Everyday I love to wake up because I know that even though Daniel and I settle into our same routine, I will experience something new with him. I love to just sit and watch him.

Everything is going good here; just when I think Ryan and I are going to be in a bind, we come out ok. I truly believe God has to do a great deal with that :) I have 2 interviews set up for a new job-both in women's health at St. John's and DePaul. I hope everything goes ok and one of them offers me a job-I miss women's health! I still really want to go back to school for my masters. After Ryan is done with his degree. Now he is thinking Spanish.

Nothing too new to report with Ryan-he still loves his job. Still having some trouble being by himself with Daniel but I hope time will help both of them. It's hard to play nurse and mommy at work :)

Anyway, this is all for now. But expect more updates soon!